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Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Reading my archives, my posts are dreadfully embarrassing even though it was a mere 2years ago. I notice a poignant recurrance of hahas in my posts and just today I mentioned to Jeannie how I know I abuse this word (sound rather) because somehow it just makes everything seem less lugubre.

It's just like how I face life, like I ignore everything bad till it really gets far too dreadful to push aside.

I've gotten better at being alone admist a throng of other people, and generally just doing small things that personally make me happy, like stopping to laugh in the middle of the road or peeking over a stranger's shoulder at what they type in an sms (nothing scandalous so far).

I've begun to care less and this isn't exactly a good thing. I mentally construct far too many imaginary scenarios that would make my life more exciting, but this act can keep me occupied for extended bouts of times (thereby making my life more exciting).

I actually daydream in sessions, stopping myself from daydreaming too far into my imaginary story or filling in too many details, to save the current daydream for another occasion.

Everyday in school we assemble on the tracks for flag-raising. And everyday I stand on the grass instead of the track, because my logic is that if the grandstands ceiling collapses unto the track, I'd be safe.

I pledge to speak more intelligibly and stop using hahas excessively to fill in the gaps of conversation/recount.

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