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Wednesday, February 27, 2008

I was in a strangely good mood earlier on for no good reason since nothing great has been happening. I'm still incapable, more discouraged, bored and lonely.

I got a panic attack yesterday where suddenly fear engulfed me, my whole torso felt foreign and constricted and each breath become more apparent. Why? I don't know, I'm not extremely stressed.

Detention today. 3rd time my name has been called for it, but 1st time I'm attending. Organised and transported stacks of pamphlets, which required back-breaking labour and gleaned much perspiration. But ultimately, satisfaction, as I watched our piles of booklets slowly form, separated for each class.

At the end, I let myself fall into the pile of paper that had been wrapped around the stacks of pamphlets. If I were still in France I could lie back in redolent mountains of fallen leaves.

There's so much I have to do. Namely, French exam tomorrow, Biology test the following day, letters to reply, etc etc. Yet I'm checking and organising my Itunes list because I hate spelling mistakes or lack of capital letters.

And it's late and the night is neither young nor over and I'm alone at home.
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